Past or Future Focused?

Tonight I found and looked through the photo album we were given at graduation for the first time since being home from Semester. Reading the letters from the staff got me thinking. They said it in different ways, but most if not all of them said in one way or another, Summit Semester is the beginning not the end, we need to remember what we learned there, we need to create community wherever God leads us, and most importantly we need to keep Christ as our focus so our lives reflect Him.

Before leaving Semester, I had a conversation with Rachel, and then again with several others, about how we don’t want to live in the past, continuing to miss Semester and wishing we could go back instead of looking to the future and focusing on what God has in store for us.  After reading the letters from the staffers I began to feel like I am doing exactly what I said I didn’t want to do. Every single day I think of something I miss from Semester, or I tell a story about something that happened at Semester, or I look through pictures from Semester. I know remembering is good, and telling stories is good, and keeping up friendships is good. But those things are not good if that’s all I’m doing and I’m not focusing on living well and serving God where I am now.

I feel like I am trying to serve God where I am and it seems to be accomplishing things. The small group I’m leading is going wonderfully and God is really working there. I have a couple of high school girls that I’ve found I’ve been able to step up in my relationship with and mentor and disciple them. But I still haven’t found anyone to mentor and disciple me. And I don’t want to become a cup that’s continually pouring out without ever getting refilled. But I feel like I’m not living up to my potential. God has given me so many talents and passions but if I don’t use them to further His kingdom they are just going to waste.

This is the part where I figure out the solution. Only one problem… I don’t have a solution. I know Jeff Myers would say “I know you don’t know, but if you did know, what would the answer be.” But I really don’t know. I am praying and will continue to pray about it.