Tonight I found and looked through
the photo album we were given at graduation for the first time since being home
from Semester. Reading the letters from the staff got me thinking. They said it
in different ways, but most if not all of them said in one way or another,
Summit Semester is the beginning not the end, we need to remember what we
learned there, we need to create community wherever God leads us, and most
importantly we need to keep Christ as our focus so our lives reflect Him.
Before leaving Semester, I had a
conversation with Rachel, and then again with several others, about how we don’t
want to live in the past, continuing to miss Semester and wishing we could go
back instead of looking to the future and focusing on what God has in store for
us. After reading the letters from the
staffers I began to feel like I am doing exactly what I said I didn’t want to
do. Every single day I think of something I miss from Semester, or I tell a
story about something that happened at Semester, or I look through pictures
from Semester. I know remembering is good, and telling stories is good, and
keeping up friendships is good. But those things are not good if that’s all I’m
doing and I’m not focusing on living well and serving God where I am now.
I feel like I am trying to serve
God where I am and it seems to be accomplishing things. The small group I’m
leading is going wonderfully and God is really working there. I have a couple of
high school girls that I’ve found I’ve been able to step up in my relationship
with and mentor and disciple them. But I still haven’t found anyone to mentor
and disciple me. And I don’t want to become a cup that’s continually pouring
out without ever getting refilled. But I feel like I’m not living up to my
potential. God has given me so many talents and passions but if I don’t use
them to further His kingdom they are just going to waste.
This is the part where I figure out
the solution. Only one problem… I don’t have a solution. I know Jeff Myers
would say “I know you don’t know, but if you did know, what would the answer
be.” But I really don’t know. I am praying and will continue to pray about it.
